Beautiful Death

Book Review: Beautiful Death by Fiona McIntosh (Jack Hawksworth #2)

I rated the first book in this series (Bye Bye Baby) as average, a 3 out of 5. But I decided, considering as there’s only two books in the series, to give Beautiful Death a go. Well, truthfully, I wish I hadn’t bothered.

I’ll start with Jack, our ‘hero’ (in inverted commas). What a prat. Seriously, I can’t think of a book hero who is more unlikeable than Jack at the moment. He wasn’t great in book one, but he reaches new lows in this outing. I just wanted to slap him and his pretty face silly. Yes, I know he has a pretty face because McIntosh reminds us that he is movie star handsome EVERY FIVE MINUTES. As such, every female character wants him, even randoms like flight attendants. (Oh, and in one ‘memorable’ scene a potential witness decides she will only offer up a testimony if he’s as attractive in the flesh as she’s been led to believe by the other detectives. W.T.Actual.)

I was about to say his lovelife was complicated but I’m not sure that’s the correct description It’s more like he just lets his little policeman lead him around and to hell with the consequences. In the beginning of the book we meet the new love of his life, Lily. Soon, however, poor Lily (who is also the female diversity card character) must be killed by a serial killer to give Jack (the handsome white hero) some depth (don’t get me started on this rant). Jack’s grief lasts approximately 1.20729385 seconds because he begins to get all tingly around the psychiatrist he’s been forced to see due to his relationship with the serial killer from book one. Yeah, okay, more stupid than complicated.

Of course it’s not only Jack who is fickle. His fellow detective, Kate, is also on the hunt for any man with a pulse. Jack, of course, is the OH SO HANDSOME love of her life and she’s set to wallow in her unrequited love alone forever. But wait… There is the attractive surgeon who might be available for dinner. Or Jack’s policeman mate, Geoff, who tells her she’s a twit to her face on their first meeting, but nevermind he’s not bad looking….

And don’t go thinking that putting a ring on it changes anything when it comes to Jack and Kate’s relationships with the opposite sex. Lily was engaged, the surgeon is engaged, the shrink is married, Geoff was about to spend a week or so away with another woman and Kate’s bed is barely cold after calling off her engagement.

Besides the inappropriateness due to cheating aspect, there’s also the huge lack of professionalism portrayed by the characters. Yes, Jack, the lead detective on the case was in a sexual relationship with one of the victims. I think I could write a thesis on the inappropriateness of this but McIntosh probably did it for me. Characters thinking or talking about how Jack shouldn’t be leading up the team takes up half the book, I swear. And yet no one ever follows through and removes him from the case. Obviously he’s just so vital to the case and so clever and so nice and so charming and, oh, did McIntosh mention he’s so handsome and I CAN’T EVEN.

If this wasn’t far-fetched enough, there’s also the inappropriate relationship that Jack starts with his shrink. Forget being treated in her offices, they’ll be meeting for his sessions at cafes and pubs and her house… I guess Jack is just so gosh-darn handsome, the doc just can’t help herself.

While Jack is walking around brooding about sex with Lily and potential sex with the doc and never having sex with Kate and the great sex he had with his girlfriend from book one, his underlings figure out 80% of the mystery plot. The other 20% is resolved by Jack and Kate stumbling over the truth without ever carrying out any real police work/detecting. For the reader, everything is pretty obvious within the first few chapters (or so it seemed — I certainly don’t remember a moment in the book I didn’t know who would be kidnapped next, who would be the killer, and who would be the red herring).

I’m trying to think of one positive out of this book and I’m really struggling. The characters are obviously annoying as hell, the plot was stupid, and the big twist at the end was just annoyingly stupid (and, typically, had something to do with Jack and sex). The descriptive passages were nothing special and the dialogue rambling and repetitive. I wouldn’t have continued with this series even if McIntosh hadn’t given it up. It doesn’t make me want to rush out and buy one of her historical offerings, that’s for sure.

1 ½ to 2. More deathly boring than beautiful.

Bye Bye Baby

Book Review: Bye Bye Baby by Fiona McIntosh (Jack Hawksworth #1)

Before Fiona McIntosh made her name and the bestseller list with historical romantic fiction, she tried her hand at a couple of mystery/thrillers. I picked up this one, the first of a shortlived series, cheaply and thought I’d give it a go. It’s not a bad book overall but I can perhaps see why she switched genres.

The story revolves around DCI Jack Hawksworth who is heading up the team on the hunt for a murderer who might just be a serial killer, given that two men have been found murdered in very similar ways.

Jack is an okay character but maybe a bit bland. We also get quite a lot from the killer’s point of view, including their background and motivation for killing. I’m not sure what I thought about this; I almost found some of the details were a little far fetched.

I wasn’t sure about the romantic B plot either. Basically Jack has two potential suitors; Kate, one of his underling detectives, and Sophie, his neighbour. It turns into more of a love quadrangle than triangle actually as Kate is already engaged to another man. None of it really works completely for me but I guess some of it might be explored further in the second book.

The length of this book is crazy. It’s a huge 573 pages. Obviously there were a lot of scenes that could have been cut (I’ll say the endless repeating of the background story of the killer — it felt like McIntosh went over it again and again).

Also, despite the book’s size, the mystery plot wasn’t that complicated. In fact, one important plot point was glaringly obvious. The book detectives too, must have thought the same as they seemed to solve things and reach conclusions with apparent ease.

I’ve got to mention too that McIntosh came across as someone with a bit of an issue with appearances. She probably spent 200 of those 573 pages telling how handsome Jack was and how beautiful Sophie was. We also got passages and passages dedicated to how fat one of the other characters was, how handsome one of the victims was, and how one of the other potential victims was not handsome. My care factor was low. (I hope her historical fiction books don’t always have these extremely cliched beautiful characters in them but I guess they probably do… *sigh*)

The Brighton area, on the other hand, doesn’t really come out looking good! The old disused pier actually sounded horrid and the description of flocks of starlings living there only evoked thoughts of stinky bird dropping, I’m afraid.

I probably will read the sequel though. One advantage of McIntosh abandoning the genre does mean it’s not too much of an effort to read a series of two books. However, I’ve checked and it’s crazy long too at almost 500 pages. *sigh*

I guess I’d give this 3 out of 5